the horizon

Our first family vacation since Mike’s accident ended, like most vacations much too quickly. We have so many family photos that we’ve taken throughout the years but some of the most memorable are those taken at the beach. There’s a certain something that comes alive in us with that combination of sun, surf and sand. Mike’s infamous (as one doctor tagged it) “Bay Watch Babe” photo was taken on a beach in Barbados.  Our pictures this trip were taken in Myrtle Beach on a trip that was long overdue and we all came away with wanting more. More time on the beach, more fun in the sun but mostly wanting more time with each other without having to deal with the stresses of daily life.  Ahhh…the beach.

The weather was unpredicatable but that made for great waves!  The water was a little on the cold side but once you got used to it, it felt soooo good.  To be truthful, I was concerned for Mike’s experience. The power of the ocean has over taken even the best of swimmers and I couldn’t help but think that Mike’s balance would be an issue. He couldn’t wait to get in the ocean and with the temperature of the water,  Nate and Bobby were not jumping up to join him.  I actually wanted to catch a few rays before getting in but it seemed like they were willing to let him go by himself and I was not. Wait up Mike!

In he went much like he had so many times before. Fearless. Not me. The waves were huge and it was cold on the belly! You know that take your breath kind of cold but as Mike plowed further and deeper into the  water I knew I needed to keep going “just in case”.  Just in case? What did I think I was going to do? I can swim but compared to Mike and Nate, I look like I’m treading water so if Mike got in trouble did I think my super powers were going to kick in?  Yes, indeed.  Go through what we’ve been through and you will totally believe that you can tame wild beasts if that’s what it takes. 

By now we’re up to waves that are well above 10 feet…without wave 5 ft with wave 10 ft…make sense? We’re both trying our best to ride one in but I am so focused on making sure Mike is still okay that my timing is off. I turn around and two waves back  looks like the Tsunami of ‘95 and I’m like “Mike! Catch this wave it’s huge!”  I watch to make sure he isn’t crushed by it then glance over my shoulder and boom. Down I go with ears, mouth, eyes (seemed like all orifices) open. Not a joy ride. Not the ride that takes you to the shoreline either. This is the ride that feels like the washing machine spin cycle. I finally come up for air and no Mike.  No Mike!  AGH!!!! I see Nate coming in to the water and then I see Mike’s head. I smile, he smiles, Nate smiles. Mike tells me later that he was thrown to the bottom of the ocean and hit his head right on the top.  ”that’s it! Out of the water!”  I did say that but I was kidding and then there was another wave and well, you know….so much fun…me, Bobby, Emily, Mike and the KING of the waves Nate - Surf’s up dude!

Everyone but Sylvette enjoyed the salt water play while it lasted. Sylvette was busy getting her burn on…oh, yeah. The burn that lasted the rest of the week…she says she’ll use sunscreen from now on. Really Sylvette? Really?

The next few days would include many more firsts in this journey back to life for Michael. NASCAR till you drop.  Who doesn’t love go-carts? Maybe a guy who would have trouble getting in and out of those little cars because of mobility or balance issues but not this guy. First race - ok, I’ll admit I am a little protective but come on. So - first race and I lag behind in my car so I can make sure…yeah, that’s right so I can make sure Mike is ok…get over it! All of us are in our little cars and while we usually take no prisoners, I think this first race we might have driven more cautiously. Well, maybe just Mike and I did.  Seeing Mike’s face as we turned for the second lap you could tell he was probably feeling different than he did last time we were together at NASCAR. He didn’t quit, he kept driving and actually drove very well.  I pulled in as Mike was attempting to get out of the car and I’m glad Bobby was there to help him get out. Mike was feeling light headed and you could see his heart pounding through his shirt. His face was flushed and he was breathing very rapidly.  I could tell he enjoyed the drive but I also knew he wasn’t okay. As everyone started to gather I asked “how did it go, Mike?” he looked at me with eyes swimming and said “good. pretty good I guess, what’s next?”  He could barely stand but in the excitement I don’t think anyone else noticed. I said to him quietly “it’s ok if you need to take a break or sit down, everyone will understand”  By now, sweat was pouring from his brow and his breathing was still very rapid.  He said “maybe I would like to sit down, I feel a little dizzy.”  Was it the huge cognitive challenge of rapid fire decision making? Was it motion sickness- round and round and round the track? Was it apprehension? Panic? Who knows, maybe yes to all.  Regardless of what happened on the first track, within five minutes Michael got up and this time when he asked “what’s next?”, he meant it. 

I hope you never lose your sense of wonder,
You get your fill to eat but always keep that hunger,
May you never take one single breath for granted,
GOD forbid love ever leave you empty handed,
I hope you still feel small when you stand beside the ocean,
Whenever one door closes, I hope one more opens,
Promise me that you’ll give faith a fighting chance
And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance.
Dance!

Mike  will be busier than ever beginning Monday. He was invited to join the first ever Cognitive Rehab Group through Brain Injury Services. We were told that after meeting Michael this January, the director was  so impressed by the level of his improvement since Jan. ‘08 and the attitude and commitment Michael had toward continued recovery that she went to the board to express the need for additional services. Michael and a few other TBI survivors were the inspiration for the development of this program at BIS. Yeah Michael!  Thank you, Lisa.

Mike’s schedule for a few months:

Monday - 10:30 am to 12:00 pm Cognitive Rehabilitation Group sessions at BIS

Tuesday - swimming with Nate

Wednesday - 10:00 am - 12:00 pm Adjustment Group at BIS

Thursday - 11:00 pm - work with Jim at Dito Web

Friday - 10:30 pm - 12:00 pm  Cognitive Rehabilitation Individual sessions at BIS

Friday - 1:00pm - 2:00 pm Neuropsychologist sessions 

AND…today he became a PAL. Mike has joined a mentoring program through BIS where he will not only receive a PAL, he is also able to pay it forward by being a PAL himself.  He met his 19 year old PAL this afternoon and made tenative plans to play a couple rounds of putt-putt in the near future.  Mike will meet his PAL June 13th at a PAL sponsored BBQ picnic.  A couple times a month, PALS devote an afternoon to help someone else develop social skills and maybe along the way make a new friend.  Helping others open doors to hope for a brighter future. Now that’s what I’m talking about! One Love.

LIVESTRONG Michael.

xxoo