the holiday season
I try every week to find time to post updates but for some reason, it is a task that keeps getting moved to the “I’ll do it tomorrow” list of to do’s.
December 1, 2008 finds us carrying more weight than last year (in more ways than one) but as a family we have so much to be thankful for. This time last year, Mike had been transferred from INOVA Fairfax Hospital to Mt.Vernon Rehab and had been there for about two weeks. He would have five more weeks of hospital care and in-patient rehabilitation. We took a Thanksgiving meal to him in the hospital - to his room with a view. One year later and never more sincere, we gave thanks to God for all our blessings. Every holiday since Michael’s accident and return to “life” is a first for us and although it is not life as it was, it is life as it is. We celebrate life for all it’s worth. We celebrate like any first - first birthday, first 4th of July, first Halloween, the first Thanksgiving… every day, every event, every holiday - another celebration of life. Our bonded family never stronger, never more thankful.
Our group of friends is and will be going through some “firsts” of their own this holiday season. My thoughts and prayer are with each and every one of them and pray they find strength and the courage to face their first without. It was this same beautiful circle of friends and family that held me together when I had to remember life. Through thick and thin we share. We share tears and it’s okay, we laugh like there’s no tomorrow because we’ve learned that tomorrow is not promised or guaranteed. Together we remember to put one foot in front of the other, we breathe in, we breathe out.
Mike played football with his boys this weekend. It was held the Saturday after Thanksgiving and when I asked Mike if he would like to go to watch the guys play he said “no” very matter of factly. That followed immediately by ”I want to play.” My first thought was - no way buddy - but without emasculating, I needed to be careful how I told him “no way buddy!” So, I chose to go over that it hadn’t been that long since his accident, did he remember how rough it got, how many people had gotten hurt in years before and that risking injury to his head, in my opinion was not worth it. I got nowhere. He said he didn’t want to go if he couldn’t play - he wanted to go and he wanted to play. He thought I was being over protective and we all know I can be so guilty of that. I would have to kill someone if they hurt him. I knew if he went, more so if he played, I couldn’t go. Without a doubt, I would be that Mom.
As he was getting ready, Mike said “Mom, I had a helmet in the hospital right? Do we still have it?” Not that he remembered but he still looks at photos and reads the blog every day - there are pictures of him at Fairfax Hospital wearing a helmet when there was no skull to protect his brain. “It’s in the garage,why?” Mike says “I think it would be funny to take it and then say, hey I brought my helmet did you bring yours?” Was it comforting? Was it more comfortable for him to be the one to point out to his friends that he was aware he wasn’t quite the same as he was Turkey Bowl ‘06? Was it for me? As Mike says “the world may never know”. At the end of it all, he came away unscathed (thanks guys), got to spend time with who he calls “the best friends in the world”, and got to spend a few hours being as close to the guy he remembers being before in the blink of an eye, everything changed.
Stay safe this holiday season - take care of each other - friends don’t let friends drive drunk. Don’t ever forget it.
Let Mike be the lesson.
One Love
xxoo