There are so many hills to climb but the debilitating loss of short term memory seems to be affecting Michael the most.  To use an analogy that would suit Michael’s way of thinking, someone changed his processor from an Intel Core 2 to a Pentium 1 and removed his RAM.  We’re using a calendar to keep track of daily schedules and activities, and taking pictures (when I remember) of people that come to visit.  We’re practicing writing and we journal as much of the day that he remembers but the fatigue that accompanies TBI, battles to control.  Within 10 minutes, he has no recollection and when he’s tired, it’s lost within 5 minutes. 

Unless it somehow made a memory…  Bobby’s brother Ben is friends with Shaquille O’Neil.  When they spoke, Shaq said that when he was in the DC area he would try to stop by and see Mike but in the mean time he would send him a little something.  “Who’s sending you an autographed basketball?”  Without missing a beat, he responds “Shaq!” every time.

There is a HUGE difference in the quality of rehabilitation a patient receives after leaving in-patient rehabilitation and moves on to in-home therapy.  Michael made tremendous progress in those 6 weeks at Mt.Vernon where 3-4 hours a day he worked with therapeutic professionals that never slacked or stopped pushing him.  He now has therapy twice a week with OT,  so far twice a week with PT and praise God the Speech Therapist agreed to come three times a week.  On Monday, the Physical Therapist arrived late and left early and asked him after every exercise if he needed a rest.  Ok, maybe I’m being a little tough on her but the coming late and leaving early is not acceptable.

Despite the reduced professional assistance, we are pushing forward.  Michael and I work each day to ensure that he progresses and he is.  He is determined and so am I.  We laugh, we talk, we never act like this is forever.  We look at today, we set goals for tomorrow and that’s how we make it through.  We talk about the damaged parts of his brain and how the healthy new connections are fighting to push the old damaged pieces out of the way.  How the damaged parts sometimes speak first and how important it is to find ways to help the new guys get stronger so they take over. 

We don’t know what the future holds so looking forward is only a guess.  For my own strength, I can only believe that the future holds promise for Michael and the dreams of his life are still attainable.

At the dinner table Mike says, “I love that girl.”   “I know, honey.  Did you tell her?”  “No, I think she knows”, Mike says quietly.  Although she was long gone, he says when asked about visitors, ”she’s upstairs sleeping”  and argues with Nate that it was true.  The truth hurts when no one is there when he gets to his room, and as his head hits the pillow he asks, ” do you think I’m going to be ok?”  My response came with confidence.  The confidence you give when your child takes off on that first bike ride with no training wheels “You’re going to be fine.  Don’t doubt it for a minute.”