Memories

As Nate and Mike were having a good laugh last night, Michael says, “we have alot of good memories.”   Thank God he has memories.

There are families on this fifth floor that would trade places with us in a heartbeat.  Although they are strolling their sons in wheelchairs, the very essence of their child is gone.  The works of that four-pound blob that rests inside our skull not only controls our ability to move, to smell, to hear and to speak but determines our sense of self.  Watching as Michael and Nathan laugh, I see the essence of Michael.  This is more than we were told to expect, but this is exactly what we prayed for.

The dialogues, the recent questions and search for memory of the accident, the humor, the amazing strength to persevere and overcome the daily challenges are the most fascinating aspects of Michael’s recovery.  However, there is still that tremendous sadness lurking over my shoulder.  I push it away so I don’t see it, I don’t want to feel it.  Traumatic brain injury by definition is an altered state of consciousness that results in physical and mental impairment.  I find an altered state of consciousness sometimes.  Somewhere just outside the harsh reality.  Sometimes you have to.

I am a mother.  I breathe in, I breathe out, and my strength is restored.  I remember that I am truly blessed to be a part of this amazing child’s life.  Blessed beyond what Michael’s doctors could see.   I remember that the journey is the reward.  I begin again.  I thank God again.

xxoo

3 Responses

1. Melvin & Susie
   December 4th, 2007 at 7:04 pm “The steadfast love of the Lord NEVER ceases. His mercies, they NEVER come to an end. They are new EVERY morning. Great is thy faithfulness, O God. Great is THY faithfulness.” (even in the midst of our undeserving lives) Lam. 3:22&23

   What an awesome story! Our huge family has not known a lot of tragedy, but God picked you to help demonstrate his AMAZING faithfulness. I will pray for God’s strength to help you bear this burden.

2. Lisa&Ken Saville
   December 4th, 2007 at 9:12 pm Rae, Bobby and family- I read in amazement everyday of Mikes recovery. I cannot help but smile at his progess and healing. He is truly a miracle and has so much to show for it. I think of you often and pray for you all. You are right, I do believe in the power of prayer too. He is a shining example of the miracles that God puts before us.

   Lisa

3. Mary Whiting
   December 5th, 2007 at 12:05 am Hey Rae and Rosner-New-Whiting family.:) I just wanted to send some love and a prayer for Michael. I wanted to make it out this Sunday, but I caught some virus and I thought it would be in everyone’s best interest not to visit this weekend. I just wanted to say Mike you’re in my thoughts and I wish that I could be there to see you and all of your wonderful progress!! Everyone keeps asking me about you at my work and they are all awed by the fact that you have made so much progress in these past 2 weeks! I love you!:*

   See you all when I get better:/