hello world part 2

I feel that things do happen for a reason.  Although I thought I was, I was not living the best of life prior to the accident. Since the accident I have had no desire to smoke or drink or anything else.  I still do get very lonely and that’s most of the time but I can’t thank my friends enough for their attempts to keep me involved. The brain injury has turned my life around. I had wanted to stop drinking anyway but was never successful. The accident turned my life around from where it WAS going to where it IS going. I like to think the brain injury hasn’t affected me at all but I guess it has.  I had a neuro psych test recently where I learned, surprise surprise that I still have above average intelligence but that my math skills are now those of a seventh grader.  My strength before was in math and sciences which was the reason I wanted to get my PHD. To hear that news was humbling to say the least but it will not change my attitude or my drive because I have always been and will always be a hard worker. Sometimes I lose track of what I’m talking about so it definitely affected my ability with conversation.  I get confused.  I’ve always known I had awesome friends but to this day they continue to prove me right. They are patient and accepting.  I am not the same person I was before. But this being said I still think that giving up is not an option and I am still “strong like bull”.  I think I’m doing well emotionally. Since my accident I ‘ve had to learn patience which was not a strong suit of mine but it has had to become a stronger aspect of my personality. I’ve come to realize how precious life is and how fragile it is.Going to church gives me a sense of gratitude for my life and being able to walk in and just be there. My back hurts while I’m sitting there but that pain is only temporary. It’s pretty simple, being in church helps me remember that I am blessed to be alive. When I went to see Dr. Hebda I learned that my brain is uneven.  That the left side is alot stronger and not as damaged as the right.  I’ve always been very analytical and always thought that the right side of my brain was the creative side. As it turns out the right side helps with being analytical.  This is what I think. The left side is like the bank.  The right side is the atm card and my atm card is damaged.  I have alot of money in the bank but I have a hard time getting it out because of the damage.

Obviously the lesson to be gained in this story is “don’t drink and drive” or you are screwed. Maybe not screwed but you will have alot of hard work ahead of you. My story may not change the way you think. I don’t expect to change the lives of anyone but i at least hope that it does. Things happen to people. They happen and they are out of our control.  Unstoppable.  to be honest, I don’t think anyone else’s experience would have changed my very destructive life before. I’m not here to make a point but just to share my experience to whoever is listening but if it does change a life then this DID happen for a reason.

Special shout outs to the Mc’s – I love you guys. Stay up.