week 8 at home

Great News!  After weeks of battling with the insurance company, the program director from Mt.Vernon called this week to say that Mike’s insurance case manager had approved and signed the contract for Mt. Vernon Rehab’s Bridge Program.  Although the Blue Shield insurance case manager kept telling us that this program was not covered or available to Mike, it turns out somehow that it is.  She insisted that we consider and accept National Rehab Center on Irving St. in DC and continued to offer that as the only option.  I’m so glad we kept pushing.

This is Mike’s last week of in-home therapy and Tuesday of next week he will begin treatment evaluations for the Bridge Program.  Nothing in stone but based on previous conversations, he’ll be there 3-5 days a week, 4-5 hours each day.  Mike’s insurance will cover individual therapy but will not cover the vitally important group portion of the rehabilitation process.   Group therapy will allow Mike to socialize with others that have suffered a traumatic brain injury and may share the same problems and concerns with daily living and re-entering society.   We’ll pay out of pocket for the group sessions but the benefits for Michael will far out weigh the financial toll.  There is not one moment in the day when we’re not looking for the light at the end of the tunnel and to hear that Mike will have at least 10 weeks of intense rehabilitation therapy with the Bridge Program is a light that shines bright for sure.      

For Mike there are times during the day that the brain injury becomes his identity, when he feels a total disconnect from his life before the accident.  The more aware he becomes the more he asks about the accident and about his car.  He asks about his Blackberry and talks about what service he has.  He often wonders if he should or needs to call work.  What day is it?  Where’s my car?  Did I have shoulder surgery?  Do you know Amanda’s home phone number?  Is Nate coming over?  Did Karl say he was coming over today?  I think I have scoliosis.  What day is it?  Did Amanda call?  Have I seen Shannon?  He realizes everyone else is going to work, still driving their cars, still going out and hanging with the same social circle.  Yearning to do those things but not able to, I’ll see his face droop as a little bit of reality sets in.  Those are tough times when the reflection he sees in the mirror is a 25 year old unemployed male with a brain injury.  A life forever changed.  Feeling alone, living at home, separated from his friends, needing assistance for daily living and feeling confused throughout the day because his memory fails him.  It’s certainly ok to have moments of acceptance, but not defeat.  Lucky?  Recovering?  Forever changed?  Disabled?  SURVIVOR!

I make it my goal every single day to help Michael walk with his head up, to help him focus on the positive forces available and to never give up hope.  When you remember the extent of damage to Mike’s brain, consider how fragile the brain is and then realize that our sense of self, life and order all reside in there - it’s no surprise that there are times that Mike struggles with who he is.  The brain itself defines who we are.

Mike is certainly not alone in this.  TBI statistics for males under 30 are staggering.  The director at Mt. Vernon said that they are breaking records for the number of patients in rehab from brain injuries.  Our goal for Michael isn’t necessarily trying to get him back to pre-October 21, 2007 “normal” but through rehabilitation, finding a “new” normal.  He has made tremendous progress thus far and I have no doubt that he will continue to amaze us with his strength and perseverence. 

As we begin this next phase in Mike’s recovery, he’ll be developing skills that will help him redefine his identity.  The broken connections of Mike’s brain can regenerate and can detour around the damaged parts and find new paths.  As we watched American Idol (Mike never liked idol before but he really has no choice now) he would say the contestant’s full name as they walked out on the stage.  None of the rest of us knew their names but somehow that amazing brain of his stored that information and he was able to pull up the memory.  I found that fascinating.  The more challenging and complex cognitive rebuild will probably be years “under construction” but we’ll find a way to keep him in therapeutic rehabilitation programs until the need is no longer there.  

If you ask Mike, his physical strength is not progressing fast enough but we are overjoyed with the successes we have seen thus far.  Mike is walking down the length of our street and back.  Although physically tasking, he is making trips up and down the stairs in the house with no hands pushing the limitations of his strength and balance.  He is improving the limited range of motion in his upper body and strengthening muscles needed to support the compression fractures in his back while swimming laps at the pool.  It seems people with TBI who exercise daily have fewer symptoms and better cognitive function.  So while Mike is swimming, using the elliptical, riding the stationary bike and using free weights he is not only improving his functional ability but increasing the overall quality of his life.   

We are anticipating great strides in Michael’s recovery and rehabilitation over the next three months at Mt. Vernon and outside of The Bridge Program; we have made a commitment to keep him swimming.  For me personally…HOPE has never been more ALIVE! 

My dearest Michael – LIVESTRONG

xxoo